You’ve been getting to know your #him for a while now. You can truly say you like him. Your heart flutters when you hear his name. The thought of him makes you smile. There haven’t been too many hiccups so far, so there hasn’t been a reason to run. Well, until you started to ponder your actual relationship status. You realized that he hasn’t mentioned anything about being exclusive and wonder if he will ever do so. You finally muster up the courage to ask him where do you two stand and what future he sees for you. If he said anything similar to one of the following, get on out, girl.
“I just want to take my time. I don’t want to rush into anything.”
“Let’s see how this goes.”
“I like what we have now.”
“Labels ruin things.”
“We’ll see.”
“I don’t want to risk anything by placing any expectations.”
“Maybe.”
“I want to get to know you better.”
“I mean, I’m not seeing anyone else. Are you trying to date somebody?”
All of these are excuses to keep you along for the ride that doesn’t have a real destination. Simply put, he’s saying he isn’t ready to settle down for whatever reason. He doesn’t want to commit.
He could be immature and simply enjoy the “freedom” that comes with no solid definition. However, that does not mean that he might not have some interest in you. He could honestly enjoy you as much as you enjoy him…just not enough to be on the lockdown.
BUT, he does not mind whatever y’all are doing now. If you don’t need a title and do not mind him being able to do whatever he wants because technically you two aren’t “together”, then have at it. But don’t compromise your wants out of this relationship because he is stagnant.
If you want to date someone who wants to date you and wants to claim the relationship publicly, then he isn’t the guy for you. Don’t let your pride nor a state of solitude jeopardize your happiness. You are worth more than that.
That’s that word. Always on time, always relevant, always needed. Praise.
Ugh this is so hard cause I feel like I’m going through this even though we haven’t been talking that long, he just got out of a long relationship and really just stopped talking to her this summer and he doesn’t want to go into another one but I’m ready to… I feel like I’m going back on my standards just to keep him close
Have you tried talking to him about it? He seems comfortable w/the perks of a relationship without actually saying it.
Yeah, I finally said fuck it and sent him this stupid long text lmao, and he ended up calling me… He says he’s perfectly fine in not having sex anymore (which means there’s someone else who’s there to give it to him) he just likes me around and/or my personality ( so he says) he just doesn’t want to be “responsible for someone else” at the moment. Then he said he felt pressured because I kind of gave him an ultimatum like make me his girlfriend or I’m done talking to you. Which when I heard it like that I was like sheesh lmao but I’m just high key hoping once I get myself together enough to talk to other people I’ll get in a relationship and then be perfectly fine with us being friends.
I’m glad you actually had the talk with him though. You were able to read through his subliminals but I’m glad you’re going to work on yourself before going there again. If it’s meant to be, it’ll be.